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Keri (like the lotion)

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Week 4 for 35: More than you never wanted to know about my lady parts [Jun. 19th, 2010|10:20 am]
Keri (like the lotion)
As I crawl through week 4, indeed this proves to be an interesting time. For me anyway.

I'm still in some shock, but it's gotten much better. I suspect that it will diminish some over the next 18+ years.

Thanks so much for the well wishes, congratulations and general support, it's hard to wrap my head around that at times.
I appreciate it all though, it's extremely touching.

Who are all you people and why do you even like me? (jeebus, don't answer that)

Erik and I went to my 3rd ultrasound on Thursday. Each ultrasound doctor has been a different person, all of them have had something a little different to offer.
This one spent a huge amount of time talking about/asking questions about my IUD and the possibility (sounded more like likelihood in her opinion) it failed because it had slipped out of my uterus and was lodged in my cervix. She seemed shocked not only that they pulled it out so late in a pregnancy but that they were able to without it doing some kind of damage.

I shrug at that. This child will not be derailed. Willful thing she is.

This doctor also decided that I'm off the hook with pre-term labor worries, but that there's a reason to hook me up to a machine weekly and listen to my placenta, somehow this will tell them if it's wearing out. Placentas have a short shelf life you know. She had me make all the appointments for that, but I'm going to talk to my OB about it on Monday because I think it sounds like a big waste of time. She gave me no reason for this to be a concern other than not knowing EXACTLY where I'm at week wise. Even though based on size and growth rate with the measurements they've take, I match very well to where they think I am? Blah, it just sounds stupid.

Monday I'll have my 36th week pelvic exam (oh yay! more audience for my lady parts), and then...then...really it could be any time.
Any time.
Then a person I had no idea was there a month ago will suddenly be part of my life, and horror of horrors, I'll be a mom. A mom. Mother. Mom. Me, a mom. Imma mom.

That's so scary.

Erik continues to be so solid, so loving, so supportive, and so ok with this whole thing, I'm fortunate to have him as a partner.

Our house is torn apart, rearranging is being done, cleaning has been done, and things are about ready to go back together. We're having a shower here next weekend, one big coed thing, I'm excited and a bit guilty about it at the same time. It's a good thing people really like babies. It's a really weird thing that there's a fuss about mine.

How do I feel? Pregnant. The last few days have been hard. Everything between my belly button and my thighs ache when I move. Most of the time I feel as though my gut contains every single Thanksgiving meal I've ever consumed. I sound like Rice Crispies™ when I walk.

Erik has to tie my shoes.
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How to be 32 weeks pregnant in only 1 week [May. 28th, 2010|05:37 pm]
Keri (like the lotion)
Last week I found out I was 32 weeks pregnant.
It was a giant and crazy surprise. It still is. Every single time I think I might have my head slightly wrapped around it, I suddenly realize I do not.

You may be asking yourself how someone can be 32 weeks pregnant and have no idea. It's a fair question, I don't blame you, but for that I'll need to go into some details, so if you don't mind details, do read on, or not, I promise my feelings will not be hurt.

In April of 2009 I had a Merina IUD installed. Touting over 99% effectiveness on their own website, and having read that a mere 1 in 50,000 women can get pregnant while using it, I figured it was a pretty good alternative to shots, or pills I'd have to remember to take.
Merina contains progestin, a very low dose released over the 5 years the product is intended for. If you have the device installed you can expect your periods to become lighter over time, and even disappear all together.

Miracle of miracles this is what happened to me, praise whomever you praise, lighter periods followed by no periods by the end of 2009, way to go progestin! Yeah!

I had a really bad cough from November through most of December. Violent spells of nasty hacking, and many so hard I nearly gaged, and one morning I did cough until I threw up my orange juice. It finally went away but left behind what was a weird but welcome appetite change.

Please note this is where I really start to miss, ignore, or just skip any signs of being pregnant, and go with "but I've got an IUD" and move on. It's also where I start to feel pretty stupid but I'm working on forgiving myself for that.

So I started eating less, mostly just less, there were some things that sounded truly awful to try to eat, such as chili, I couldn't really even think about chili without feeling urpy. Sad since I love chili, and most every thing that Erik cooks really, and at this time there were some things that I just turn away from. I had many yogurt and fruit dinners. Sometimes just the vegetables and a few bites of meat, but still why would this make me think I was pregnant?

February 2010
I notice some of my pants seemed bigger, but really that didn't sink in until I put my motorcycle clothing on and I could actually button the top button of my pants, AND still get on the bike without feeling cut in half.

So my appetite is different but not gone, I eat less, I've lost weight, so what if I'm a little moody? Aren't I always? So what if watching an episode of Criminal Minds had me in an uncontrolled cry-fest where I clung to Erik and sobbed for 30 minutes? Why would that mean I'm pregnant? Piffle, I've got an IUD.

March 2010
The appetite change is weird, good christ do my boobs hurt this month, but hey I'm on a hormone, I'm turning 35, who am I to judge? Piffle, I've got an IUD.

April 2010
Still eating less than I used to, but plenty to feel comfortable and healthy. Man...what the hell is going on with my guts? Grumbly and churny, achey and gassy. Really my gut just sounded like Erik's sounds every day. Pregnant? No, he's a dude. Me? Piffle, I've got an IUD.

May 2010
My guts are on and off retarded. I've got the weirdest weight-loss pattern in the world. My pants all fall off (I start to wish I didn't hate belts) but there's still lots of gut under my boobs. hmm.... seriously what the hell is up with my gut?

Wednesday, May 19
I'm uncomfortable all day. I can't sit for very long, and man is this some bad gas, but why won't it pass? I call Erik "are your guts ok? what did we eat?" He was fine, I started to think I had a serious digestive issue, or the mother of all tape worms or.....what if I'm pregnant? I worry about this, but can't decide if I'm being a crazy paranoid person. I kept it to myself.

Thursday, May 20
Nope, still kinda freaking out. Erik comes by the shop on his way to do errands. I confess to him that I'm probably being a crazy paranoid person, but think maybe I should take a pregnancy test. We discuss it. We decide that it's likely I'm being a crazy paranoid person but Erik mentions that I'm due for an annual exam, maybe I should discuss it with the fine folks at Planned Parenthood where I had the IUD put in. It seemed reasonable so I made an appointment, and they had an opening the following morning.

Friday, May 21
Erik, because he's awesome comes to my appointment with me, waits patiently while I go back for my exam.
I get on the scale on my way in the exam room, I'm 27 pounds lighter than the day they put the IUD in. Sweet.
Planned Parenthood Lady: Do you need to use the bathroom?
Me: Um, do I need to give you a urine sample today?
Planned Parenthood Lady: Only if you want a pregnancy test.
We had a short conversation about my fears, which ends with her saying "if it was me I'd take one, just to know that I wasn't" which was about the page I was on, 5 minutes usually seems worth your piece of mind.
She came back in the room saying "well it looks like you were right to be concerned" as she reached for the box of tissues for me. I started to cry and asked her to please get Erik from the waiting room. He's not an idiot, he knew what was up before getting into the room, but I told him anyway, as if my face wasn't telling enough, should he have had any doubts.
I had them continue with my pelvic exam, and the nurse said she thought we should do an ultrasound. Things were big, big, very big.
I'm laying there on the ultrasound table, the screen is out of my view. Erik held my hand and watched them try to get a size on the baby's head. There were 2 of them in the room to start, they called in 3rd as they tried to get an accurate measurement.
Erik told me later he saw a profile and a arm.
There was lots of hemming and hawing and trying to get it just right.
As I stared at the sealing I belted out "JESUS CHRIST! I'm one of those fat women that has no idea she's pregnant!"
Erik chuckled, and the woman doing the ultrasound choked back a laugh. She instead comforted me.
I was hesitantly told, based on the measurement of the head that I was 32 weeks pregnant, there was a disclaimer offered that their machine was not the most accurate.
I spent the rest of the afternoon calling my family and friends, and mostly in shock, Erik made a ton of calls looking for prenatal care. Did I mention he's awesome?

So here we are. It's now a week later, I'm 32 weeks pregnant, I've seen a doctor I like, who backed up the 32 week estimate with his trusty tape measure.
We heard the baby's heartbeat and some tiny little hiccups.
I've had an ultrasound, a very thorough one, and everything measured out at 32 weeks.

Really I feel pretty clueless, but with the false sense of security provided by one of the MOST EFFECTIVE BIRTH CONTROLS AVAILABLE, and expecting some of my body chemistry to change at 35, it was pretty easy to miss.

Until she started kicking me.
There are some things we can't ignore or turn into something else (er...for very long), and I've found another human being kicking me, especially from inside me, is near impossible to ignore (for very long).
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My big, sweet girl [May. 11th, 2009|08:57 am]
Keri (like the lotion)

I'm working through my stages of grief at the moment, dragging my ass about going to work, the first day with Honey and no big dog may be the hardest.

I'm so lucky. Lucky to have had her as long as I did, with the people around me that loved her, despite her smell and jaw juice. I'm lucky that Mr. C is as patient with me as he is, supportive and understanding is not something all dudes are good at. Mr. B shined as a friend champion this weekend too. I asked him if he'd help dig her grave, and he took the task—starting Friday night—in it's entirety. He put her blankets down in the bottom, got in the hole and lifted her down, put a feather pillow under her head and tucked her in with another blanket. He got out and hugged me and sobbed a bit. I know how hard that was for him and I'm so grateful to him for him doing it.

I know the time was right, but I can't stop how much I miss her. We were together almost every day for the last 10 years. I thought nothing could be worse than loosing my horse but I'm not sure this isn't. There's such an awful void, I think Honey feels it too, she's sticking pretty close.

I keep looking for her, and thinking I see her out of the corner of my eye.
I'd be ok if that quit happening fairly soon.
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goodbye, goodnight [Jan. 4th, 2009|11:56 am]
Keri (like the lotion)

Thanks for waiting old man, the girls needed you and you held out.

I thought you'd loose your mind when your mother died, but you held on.

I thought you'd never forgive me when Dapples died, but you did.

I figured you'd look at me that same way when Kate died, but you didn't.

You were stronger than I thought you were and you were softer than I though you were.

Goodbye sweet old man, you'll be missed.
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best forward of yesterday [Oct. 15th, 2008|10:08 am]
Keri (like the lotion)
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, you will have $49.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago, you will have $33.00 today. If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Lehman Brothers one year ago, you will have $0.00 today. But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the aluminum cans for recycling refund, you will have received a $214.00 Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. It is called the 401-Keg.
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Katie [Oct. 10th, 2008|05:21 pm]
Keri (like the lotion)
From The Ladies & Co.

From The Ladies & Co.
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I heart this. [Jul. 30th, 2008|08:29 am]
Keri (like the lotion)
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my super awesome amazing smart and studly boyfriend [Jul. 21st, 2008|04:05 pm]
Keri (like the lotion)
he cooks!

he cleans (occasionally)!

he rides a motorcycle in whatever ridiculous safty outfit I (and/or his child) tell him to!

he weilds a chainsaw with a reasonable amount of skill!

he does some other nice things to me that I'm not interested in sharing here!

he can read! and does!

he's helped raise a really awesome teenager! (which is impressive because teenagers made me crazy when I was one!)

he also grinds stumps! 6 of them this weekend even!

RAWR! toot! toot!
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all our bed are belong to Stella [Jun. 27th, 2008|04:10 pm]
Keri (like the lotion)

Even the ones she doesn't fit in.
Please make a note of it.

Last week my brother rescued a dog.

Meet Lord Dilsworth Von Beudol:

Dilly for short, he was this bag of bones on Friday:

My brother was making a delivery on Thursday, and to make a long story short, the dude was taking the dog to the pound that afternoon because he just wasn't living up to the dog he was meant to replace and he couldn't figure out why he was so skinny. A year and a half old dog purebred dachshund!

and by the following Wednesday, with some consistent food and water we get almost a completely different animal:

One of my brothers closest friends is keeping him so we get to keep the sweet little guy close.

Going to a wedding tomorrow. My oldest friends little brother. I'm having trouble calling her my best friend at the moment, because I think she's being a butthole.
If I'm going to be fair about it though she's been a butthole for a number of years.
She's not going to be there, she didn't feel invited enough to come up from LA.

Going camping 4th of July weekend, in the wilds of the Wenatchee National Forest, hopefully we'll have time to get some dirt bikes running. Either way though, I can't wait, haven't been out there in far too long considering I spent nearly a month there every summer for most of my life. Weekend of dirt boogers here I come!

Going insane the rest of the time.

Our house is dirty.

It's also not done.

I want cake.
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(no subject) [Jun. 7th, 2008|11:23 am]
Keri (like the lotion)
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